Lindsay Lohan’s a Hoarder too?

I’m starting to think she’s pulling our collective chains.

Mo’ Laundry, Mo’ Problems.

Nod, please.

GUYS, I is soooo tiiiiiiired and I have no idea why. Here’s what I did today and you’ll see that it’s not worthy of inappropriate capitalizations, incorrect verbiage and excess vowel usage:

1) Woke up
2) Made breakfast
3) Fed the animals
4) Got ready
5) Drove Kristyn to work
6) Stopped at the supermarket
7) Did laundry (well a ton of laundry but still)
8) Watched Oprah while eating…
9) Fried tofu
10) Drank a cup of tea
11) Watched Ellen
12) Picked up Kristyn
13) Stopped at the bank
14) Drove home
15) Put away clothes
16) Told Kristyn some tales about Cancun
17) Listened to what Kristyn’s day was like
18) Took out the trash
19) Ate dinner
20) Made the bed
21) Tortured the cats
22) Uploaded pictures onto Flickr
23) This
24) Two other blogs

Sure that’s 24 things but NONE of them should make me feel as drop dead exhausted as I feel right now.

And it’s 8:32 and I have to stay up because Kell on Earth is coming on at 10!

Fer realsies.

I think I’m going to go eat some ham and drink some water (minus the ham).

Quandary about LA

Guys, I’ve been in LA for five months now and it’s fair to say that I’ve sort of got the lay of the land.

In that, there is one thing that continues to mystify me. Everywhere I go, people are really nice. They are almost suspiciously nice. Our blackened NJ hearts are only used to random kindness when someone wants something in return so there’s been a number of instances in LA where we’ve behaved weirdly to someone who is only trying to help.

That being said, one thing I AM constantly confused by is how rude Hispanic people are to me here. I’ve had plently of Hispanic neighbors and friends and co-workers and classmates, etc back in NJ. I’ve gotten along, I’ve not gotten along, whatever. But it’s always been on an individual basis whether said person and I get along. And to clarify, I’m only saying this now after five months of collected experience bc I didn’t want to make a judgement that was unfair.

In LA though, I’d venture to say that the Hispanic population might be more distrustful of white people. Whenever I meet a Hispanic person here, I can palpably feel their disgust.

And I’ve experienced racism in NJ. As a white person with blonde hair and blue eyes, I’m frequently made into a “talisman”. Racists of all colors always think I’m “on their team”. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been singled out by someone and made to listen to one offensive racist joke after another because it’s perceived that I’ll “get it”. And to be clear, I DON’T. I’ve gotten into a lot of arguments over this.

And I’ve been on the other side of it where co-workers or friends tell me that they didn’t like me at first because they thought I was (and this is a direct quote) “a stuck up rich white girl” (which I’m not stuck up or rich though I am, in fact, white).

IDK, none of us can help who we are or our knee-jerk reactions or preconceived notions and I’m not not guilty of that.

I’m just saying that as a person that doesn’t have a problem with anyone (but assholes) it’s continually jarring to be treated so harshly. But then again, that’s probably what they have been treated like and are expecting to be treated like. Walking in my shoes, I guess I’m not privy to what it feels like to be regularly discriminated against bc of what I look like so it’s surprising.

Ah IDK, I hope no one takes offense to this. No offense intended, it’s just something that bums me out for all involved. *sigh*

Has anyone else experienced this in LA?

*Speaking of “Crash”, it was written by Paul Haggis, the guy who wrote that voluminous scathing letter to the Church of Scientology (over their intolerance of gay people, go Paul Haggis!) this year. Anyway, my first day at my Internship, I got to read one of his scripts an it’s being made into a movie! That was kind of awesome for me. Anyway…

Happy Early Valentine’s Day from Richard Simmons!

I’m at the laundromat again doing ten tons of laundry. Man we’ve put a lot of stuff off for too long haha.

I’m almost done reading Dan Brown’s new book “The Lost Symbol”. Kristyn’s parents gave it to me for Christmas. This book got kind of trashed in reviews I read but I liked all his other books and wanted to give it a shot. I’m glad I did because I’m really enjoying it!!! I can see why there’d be criticism but it’s had me on the edge of MY seat haha. Then again, I’m an easy target. Also it takes place in DC which is one of my favorite cities. What’s not to love?!

It’s really nice where I’m standing. The breeze is coming in the door and it feels just like Spring…I’m wearing shorts and flip flops on February 1st. I love LA.

Okay I’m gonna go back to reading now while this shite is drying. Later haters.

We Love Pee Wee Herman!

For my 30th Birthday this year, my sister Christine and her boyfriend Matt bought me and Kristyn tickets to see Pee Wee Herman! This was after I dropped some SERIOUS hints on Facebook to the tune of:

I wouldn’t be mad if someone bought me tickets to see Pee Wee in LA.

Nosiree, I wouldn’t be angry at all.

Man I’d like to see Pee Wee.

You get the point…Anyway, I’d ordinarily just shut up and buy them but I didn’t have any spare coin since it was all tied up in moving here. When in doubt, guilt it out. So THANK YOU GUYS!!!!

So the show was originally supposed to be at the Music Box in Hollywood but there was some confusion and then the show was moved to Club Nokia in Downtown. This moved the show back a bit but worked out better because that mean we got to meet Pee Wee! Well sort of. You’ll see.

Anyway, we chose tickets for this past Friday, January 29th. Here’s a picture of the Nokia Theater. We were at “Club Nokia” which is kind of a smaller venue within the complex.

Nokia!

This week starts the Winter Olympics so there were some Target billboards hanging up and one of them featured Shaun White which I thought was kind of cool.

Shaun White Target Poster.

We’ve never been to this theater before so we really didn’t know how to navigate things. We live very close to Downtown so the ride didn’t take long and we left about an hour early for like a 15 minute drive. Unfortunately, we didn’t figure that the area around Club Nokia was kind of like an amusement park for adults. There are a lot of restaurants and theaters around there. Lucky Strike Bowling is down here too. Oh and so is the Staples Center. So needless to say, there was a lot of traffic and a lot of waiting for parking as well as many circuitous paths to get to where you want to go.

That being said, the show started at 7 and naturally we didn’t get in until 7:15…but it’s okay because out seats were the bomb!

Here’s Miss Yvonne and Pee Wee!

Miss Yvonne and Pee Wee.

Here’s Conky, Randy, Miss Yvonne, Pee Wee, Chairry and everyone else.

Miss Yvonne!

The show was hysterical. It wasn’t overly raunchy or child-friendly. It really walked a line between the both and was appropriate for the kids present and funny for the adults (there weren’t a lot of kids though but still any adult humor was very subtle).

The set.

***SPOILER***
The plot is basically a couple of things. Pee Wee wants to fly and Miss Yvonne wants to date Cowboy Curtis.

Conky, Chairy, Pee Wee!

The King of Cartoons stops by for a visit.

King of Cartoons and Pee Wee!

***SPOILER AGAIN***
Basically Jambi grants Pee Wee a wish and he wants to use it to fly but gives it to Miss Yvonne to get Captain Curtis to like her. They fall in love and Pee Wee has a temper tantrum over losing his wish. Miss Yvonne confesses what she did to Cowboy Curtis and he tells her she’s stupid bc he liked her anyway. Jambi re-grants his wish to Pee Wee who ends up flying and it looks so funny the way they do it.

Ending.

Afterward, we were told to stay seated on the floor because anyone who had bought tickets for the Music Box got a wrist band to meet Pee Wee afterward as thanks for being patient with the date change.

Kristyn!

So we sat there and tried not to lose our shit because some “oh so clever” hipsters were sitting behind us pontificating on the merits of Bjork while kicking the back of our chairs over and over again.

Moi.

Oh afterward too, Kristyn pointed out Brian Posehn! We were hoping to see Diablo Cody but I think she went to the second show. Kristyn swears she was sitting right in front of us though and I have to confess that I kept thinking that same girl was her. IDK.

What the border of the stage looked like.

Pee Wee came out and it turned out not to be like a “meet Pee Wee” type situation so much as a Q&A. We’d been hoping to get a picture with him but this was kind of cooler because we got to hear him talk and it was such a small crowd…

Pee Wee interviewing a kid.

He interviewed all the kids in the crowd. It was kind of funny because the kids really didn’t know how to answer him.

Pee Wee interviewing a kid.

He came into our row!!! He walked right past us to interview a kid and was so close! LOVELOVELOVEYOUPEEWEE!

Pee Wee's arsehole.

He was so close I wanted to wrap my arms around his waist and rest my cheek on the small of his back!

Pee Wee talking to a kid near us.

Could NOT resist taking a picture of his shoes. Kristyn got a better picture though which she’ll prob post on her blog soon.

Tequila!

OMG!!!

PEE WEE!!!!!

Ugh and right before things started this OBNOXIOUS couple sat next to us. Drunk as skunks and smelling like beer. Apparently they’re up for a Grammy for some reason but IDK what the name
of their band is. Cotton or something?

Pee Wee talking to the obnoxious couple.

The couple are from Baltimore and Pee Wee mentioned some biker bar there that John Waters took him too. For some reason, no one in the bar would believe John Waters that he was famous but Pee Wee came in and they all recognized him and went bananas. Oh how I wish me and Kristyn could go to a biker bar with Pee Wee and John Waters!!!

Stage and Pee Wee.

The Q&A was less a Q&A and more Pee Wee just talking to us. He was kind of half in character, half not. His voice is much lighter than I’d expect it to be and I just really wanted to hug him the entire time.

Chatting.

Pee Wee told us that he has two scripts written but hasn’t gotten a deal to make them into movies yet. OMG I hope he does! Also, he’s thinking of bringing his show on Broadway but doesn’t know if he wantsta do it bc you have to do a lot of shows. So IDK.

In closing.

This is the courtyard outside the Nokia Theater. Eddie Izzard was performing there too!!! We died!!

Pretty lights.

And here is the Staples Center. This is the infamous site of MJ’s “This is It” and of his memorial.

Home of MJ's Memorial/This is It.

After the show, we drove around Downtown a little because we really never go there (and it’s like ten minutes from our house duh). It’s very pretty there and very NYC-esque but not filthy haha.

We found directions to the Stillwell Hotel, otherwise known as “the Illwell”. This is the roach motel that we stayed at when we visited LA in October of 08. Aleix nailed it when he called it “The Bollywood version of The Shining”. It was so scary, old and oddly Indian-themed.

The Illwell: Bollywood version of the Shining.

When we were at the Illwell, our bathroom had a view of this building that says “Jesus Saves” on it. I kept trying to get a good picture of it out our window and I couldn’t so I got one with my iPhone.

View from the Illwell.

We went to the supermarket afterward to pick up a couple of things. While Kristyn was looking for something, I found this fan magazine based on the life of one Mrs. Sarah Palin. It made me laugh so much becase there were even like posters in there of her and her family. Haha.

Bop for Republicans.

And this is just a picture of Edith and Elvira from the morning after Pee Wee. They were sitting nicely but just after I took the picture, Edith realized how close Elvira was and a fight broke out, haha…

Edith and Elvira a second prior to fighting this morning.

I wanna pick your brains.

LOVE them.

Guys, if there’s any two people whose brains I want to pick right now, it’s these two, Amy Poehler and Will Arnett. If there in something, you can bet it’s going to be funny. What’s more is that they both have their own weird brand of humor and talent that works well together or alone. I just want to know how they do it because it inspires me.

Benefit for Haiti

RUN DON'T WALK!!!

Hey guys! My friend Aleix is the bomb and he’s co-hosting a benefit for Doctors without Borders to raise money to aid the people of Haiti. (That link is in case you are emerging from the soundproof room with no access to the outside world that you have been living in for the past two weeks. Hey it happens.) He was able to get some amazing people to appear and I’m so mad that I can’t go (bc I’m a dummy who moved to LA). It’ll be a fun night for a great cause so if you’re in the NYC area: GO!!!

If that’s not reason enough to get you to go, how about this adorable picture of Mr. Aleix himself and the late Michael Jackson:

How can you refuse these faces?

Yesterday’s Pictures

Here are just some pictures I took yesterday on my iPhone for posterity.

Here’s Monster peering out the window at me when I got home from dropping our car off at the shop to get the muffler fixed.

These next couple of pictures are of the amazing sunset on Santa Monica Boulevard when I was going to pick Kristyn back up from her internship.

Here are some pictures on the 101. Kristyn works in North Hollywood.

And here again is the giant Emmy outside of Kristyn’s Internship. So pretty.

After I picked her up, we went to Burbank to see Avatar in IMAX 3D. If you haven’t done it yet, GO. More on that later!

Also, I read from a few sources that January 25th is supposed to be THE worst day for depression amongst Americans? Or citizens of the Earth? (IDK I read it on a blog and on someone’s FB status so take it with a grain of salt, this isn’t Wikipedia.) Anyway, I can attest that I wad seriously bummed out for no good reason yesterday and I’m rarely bummed out for no reason. Now I know to make a contingency plan for all upcoming January 25ths.

Although I DID watch two episodes of “Maude” and it helped to pull me out of my doldrums. It was the one where Maude ends up “preggy”. Rue McClanahan is in this episode. So…awesome…

Also, Betty White got a lifetime achievement award at the SAG Awards the other day!!! Must YouTube. I’ll do it later, right now I feel like reading my book (I’m on a bus.)

Happy 30th Birthday Kristyn!

This past Friday (January 22nd) was Kristyn’s 30th Birthday!  She was kind of bummed out that we are in LA for her birthday and we wouldn’t be able to celebrate it with family and friends.  The one shining spot had been that it wouldn’t be cold and wintry on her birthday.  But THEN, LA decided to cough up a lot of rain which kind of spoiled all our SoCal January Birthday Defiance Plans (such as going to the beach or the boardwalk or some other outdoor activity that we couldn’t do at home on January 22nd).  So she was all booooo…

We don’t have a lot of duckets or free time right now but we both ended up with Kristyn’s birthday off and I had a little stash of duckets that I could use for her prezzies.  So to make up for the rain disappointment, I decided to make sure we had a great birthday indoors.

After work in the 21st, I picked up Kristyn’s car from her job.  I had a couple of idears on what I wanted to get her but wasn’t 100% sure yet.  I took this picture on the Sunset Strip because the size of the “Alice in Wonderland” billboard was astounding.  You can’t tell in this picture, but that poster is the size of like a ten story building or higher.  It’s HUGE.

Sunset Strip

This view is of “the Hills” as seen from my street.  It looks more vast in person.  So pretty.

View of the Hills from Effie Street

For reasons unknown even to moi, I decided to snap a photo of myself in a public restroom.  Here I am in Target’s “watering hole”.  Pretty.

Me in the Target bathroom.

My mother recently watched an entire day of “Toddlers and Tiaras” and was exhausted by the experience.  If I quarrell with my mother before Mother’s Day, I know JUST what to get her, haha.

Something to keep in mind for Mother's Day?

I shopped and shopped and shopped and shopped and shopped.  I was so confused that I began furiously texting Christine for her opinion on the prezzies I’d picked out before realizing that it was 1am on a worknight for her, haha.  Whoops!   So I texted my friend Ana who happened to be on LA time.  She gave me sage advice and off to the cashier it was!

Here is my cart on an escalator.  What?!

Cart going down the escalator.

We were supposed to go out with Ana for a spell but we were all tired and decided that we could eat pie together at another time, haha.

SO, I came home and baked a cake, wrapped my gifts, did some cursory cleaning/decorating and then set off to pick up the birthday girl.

For Kristyn!

When Kristyn got home she wanted to open her prezzies right away but was torn between the immediate pleasure of ripping them open immediately and the extended pleasure of waiting until morning.  She opted to elongate her pleasure by waiting until morning.

Prezzies.

I let Kristyn stay in bed while I made brekky and decorated the cake.  Poor thing had to lay in bed and Twitter while I got shite done.

Oh this cake is double-layer Funfetti with Vanilla icing.  Booyah.

Funfetti!

I had decided to make this a Twilight-themed party because why not?  If you want to make your 30th birthday memorable, you have a Twi-Mom party, no?  Too bad the Twilight kids all look like zombies on the napkins.  *shrug*

Twi-Mom Themed Birthday!

Here’s the breakfast I made.  Everything bagels with cream cheese, facon, OJ, water & coffee.  We demand many beverages at the breakfast table.

Twi-Mom Brekkie.

Then I want to get Kristyn up out of her stupor.  She said, “Boy I wish that I’d taken a shower before you started taking pictures…”  I said, “It’s your birthday and you don’t have anywhere to go.  Pictures of you unshowered is the PERFECT way to remember your 30th birthday.”  She said, “Okay…” in an unconvincing way.

Get up Krissy!

Like the cruel person I am, I made her take a photo with her uneaten breakfast, haha.

Krissy at Twi-Breakfast.

After breakfast, Kristyn parked it on the couch for prezzy time.

Kristyn with her prezzies.

Her first prezzie wasn’t really a prezzie so much as a snack but she loves her some Sour Patch Kids so there ya go.

Kristyn and Sour Patch Kids, sittin in a tree.

This gift is something that goes with a Wii Game we just bought, “EA Active”.  It’s a workout game that Kristyn really likes doing and she’s been eyeing these one pound hand weights.

Weighted gloves!

I also got her seasons 8 & 9 of Roseanne.  It’s the only two seasons we don’t own.  And THIS is what Ana gave me sage advice on.  I was torn between two different shows and Ana said, “DUH ROSEANNE!”  So, here we are.  Oh and Ana, Kristyn said that was the betta choice so you were right!

Roseanne!

One thing about Kristyn is that she is PERMANENTLY cold.  There’s no way to warm her up and I stifle half the time because she has the heat up on 90 with all the windows closed, fans off and three blankets on.  She trails behind me and closes all the windows I open and turns the heat back up when I lower it…SO, Snuggie it is!

Snuggie!

Here Kristyn is contentedly smashing her face up against the box, haha.

Here comes Kristyn and Snuggie with a baby carriage!

Here Kristyn is demonstrating all her prezzies.

Snuggified Kristyn.

Cake time!  I had to have her run over to the cake because the candles were  becoming destroyed within uno segundo of lighting them. 

Birthday Cake on Fiyah!

Kristyn did a good job of blowing them all out and made a wish.

Candles.

Then this happened.  Why not?  It’s HER cake…

Why not?

But THIS needed an explanation though I didn’t get one.  Still, they’re HER candles.

What?

This is how Elvira felt about it.

Elvira's excited.

I made Kristyn do the ceremonial “taking the candles out of the cake” and the “first cut of the cake”.

Ceremonial cutting of the cake.

Kristyn put a poppy seed from the Everything bagels on Edward’s face to make him look like her.  Naturally she put the seed on the wrong side again, haha.

Edward as Kristyn.

Then the mail man came with a box.  Inside the box was this!!!

Kristyn and MJ Duck!

It was from my sister Christine!  Haha…She’d seen it at a store and knew we’d die laughing to behold this and she was right.

In all his glory.

In our excitement over MJ, we threw the box down on the floor, not bothering to look at the rest of the contents inside.

Looking you dead in the eye.

We took pictures of MJ Duck.  We twittered and FB’d him.

Giving Donna Summer a lil smackaroo.

It was two or three days later that Kristyn picked up the box and looked inside.  There was some mail of ours that had come to Christine’s house AND Christine had also sent Kristyn a card and a check for her birthday, haha…Duh.

The most beguiling feature.

 Anyway, we had a relaxing day.  Kristyn downloaded music off iTunes while I crocheted.  We watched episodes of Roseanne and then the Jersey Shore Finale and Reunion episodes.

We got ready and went to Red Robin to take advantage of the birthday burger they’d sent her.  After that, we wanted to go out but weren’t sure where.  We stopped home and watched the final episode of Conan and then decided to walk up to this bar on the corner, Akbar

Akbar got good reviews on yelp and is only up on Sunset and Fountain which is like three blocks away.  It was like a gay male version of the Loop Lounge which was awesome!  The crowd was pretty nice and they played some good music so maybe we’ll spend a coupla Fridays there in the future.

Soon, it closed though so we came home and went to bed.  All in all, it was a good day!

Oh ALSO, our friend Recky put up this website for Kristyn for her birthday, haha…Go to HUMICORN.com!

Also, here’s Kristyn’s take on her own birthday: YKristyn.

Anecdotes

Today I had a good time at work although I had to read an abridged book and then the nonabridged version immediately following.

I got on the bus and realized I was at my spot too late. I pulled the stop and the bus didn’t actually stop for over ten blocks.

I think this was a revenge plot by my driver since we’d bickered the other day.

I had to walk for twenty minutes to get home.

I took the above picture of the Sunset Junction sign while in my travels.

Also, a man asked me for change, which I didn’t have. He then said, “Hey what’re you reading?!” to which I blandly replied, “Ugh” while waving my hand.

Truthfully I have no idea what the book I am reading is called.

We got a new neighbor named Russell today. I want to say he’s gay but then again, my gaydar doesn’t work in LA so who knows?

I am watching “Ugly Betty” for the first time.

No, I don’t know what’s wrong with me.

That’s all I have to babble for the moment.